I know it is a bit delayed, but here is my interpretation of John McCain's acceptance speech from last week's Republican convention:


Ehh...Hello? (Tap Tap) Is this thing on? (Turning to face the stage manager) Psst...Which button do I push? What's that? Oh it's ready to go? What? Sorry, I'm not used to these megaphone things...What's that? Oh Microphone...yeah sorry. (Turning back to the audience and the camera's) Hi Folks. I accept your nomination...thanks so much. You know what? Republicans Suck, and that is why I as the Republican nominee for president intend to sweep into Washington, where I have lived and worked and amassed oodles of governing and foreign policy experience for almost 30 years as a sucky Republican, to clean out and reform the government bureaucracy that I helped create, sustain, and screw up. Here, I took this speech from my failed 2000 campaign for the Presidency and I am just going to read that old thing for the next 25 minutes, and then I am going to talk about my great war record, don't worry folks its not a pussy ass - googoo doll-esque war record like the injury prone John Kerry, its different cause I got captured by the enemy...anyway like I said here is some stuff that used to talk about that got me this reputation as a Maverick...